14. You refuse to confide in others

We live in a culture that believes that reaching out for help is a sign of weakness. In fact, you may be withholding forgiveness because you believe it might cause you to appear weak in the eyes of others.

But if you’re reeling from hurt, it may be helpful to share your feelings with a trusted friend—in a non-gossipy way of course. The difference here is that when you gossip, you focus on the actions of the offender instead of focusing on your own feelings and owning them.

Just sharing your feelings can provide relief and perspective. It may free you from the stuck feeling and promote creative thinking to help you move on from the hurt and resentment.

What to do instead: Identify two or three people you could confide in and reach out to one of them today. Don’t think about, don’t second-guess the people you thought of. Just reach out.

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