Moving Beyond Feelings of Rejection

Moving beyond feelings of rejection involves letting go of one’s dependence on others to define one’s identity. Though this is simple to say, it is often difficult to do since the ego-self has had much time to respond in an emotionally reactive way to the actions or non-actions of others, without knowing that another way was possible.

This ego-self has been with human beings for a very long time, and so any undermining of its habits involves determination, assisted greatly by an authentic experience that there is another way to live. If the authentic experience of the ‘other way’ is profound enough, the struggle to get past the ego’s premises can be won in an instant.

The way of independence is the way of inner growth – the realization of the wholeness of the self. Each self is capable of experiencing this wholeness which is not dependent upon external circumstance, but on an inner perception of truth. Independence is a relative term, since we are also communal beings who share energy and soul connections with each other that are profound. But soul connections and being dependent are two very different things. Dependency is an emotional bond that has to do with karmic influences that shape identity. Soul connection is a positive bond, created out of love and joy, where two or more feel their inner kinship and identity of soul purpose.

The way of overcoming vulnerability to rejection is the way of turning to the Divine for all needs, and not just the Divine without but the Divine within.

Believe that your wholeness already exists within you and it will be a starting point to stabilize yourself in relation to the responses of the world, whether positive or negative. This stabilization is an essential part of spiritual growth, and is greatly aided by a regular connection with one’s higher self.

Beloved ones, the vulnerability to hurt is within your own power to change, to limit, to dissolve in the light of greater truth. This does not mean that there will not be some residual sadness when love’s purposes are turned away from by others, but that this sadness will be a Divine sadness based in compassion, not one that reflects on the personal self.

Julie Redstone is a teacher, writer, and founder of Light Omega, a center for spiritual teaching and healing in Western Massachusetts. She is also the author of , a journal/blog for spiritual awakening. The purpose of Light Omega is to create an understanding of the sacred transition into light that the Earth is presently going through and the changes this will bring to individual and planetary consciousness.

Julie Redstone is a teacher, writer, and founder of Light Omega, a center for spiritual teaching and healing in Western Massachusetts. She is also the author of The Art of Being Present, a journal/blog for spiritual awakening. The purpose of Light Omega is to create an understanding of the sacred transition into light that the Earth is presently going through and the changes this will bring to individual and planetary consciousness.

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Healing Family Relationships — Love and the Gift of Spiritual Awareness

Bringing healing to family relationships can be one of the most difficult aspects of the spiritual healing process. The reason for this is that we choose to incarnate within our specific families for the purpose of healing and growth, which often challenges us deeply to the core of our being.

For many of us it may feel as though healing is exactly the opposite of what we are receiving with our families, as we endure the difficulties and limitations of our relationships with our parents and siblings.

Before incarnating, we choose families which can bring to the surface specific issues and themes that our soul wishes to explore, learn about and heal. Often these issues are challenging and bring to the surface discomfort that we would prefer go avoid rather than face. Some people deal with this discomfort by placing blame on their parents or the situation they were born into, which provides a temporary outlet for the emotional pain they have experienced, but ultimately prevents the free flow of love, light and healing in the heart.

As we grow personally and spiritually, there comes a time when we are called to release ourselves from the emotional pain we have carried from our childhood. There are steps in this process, which may taker a shorter or longer time, or which may involve many lifetimes of learning.

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“Isn’t it still better to masturbate than to commit fornication?”

The easy answer to this question would be, “Yes, it is better to masturbate, because at best it corrupts only one person. It certainly is the lesser of two evils.” However, why would a loving, holy, all-powerful God abandon you to a situation in which you have to choose any evil, whether it be “lesser” or “greater?” To really answer this question, we must again go back to God’s original plan for sex.

First of all, masturbation will not truly relieve the sexual pressure that one may feel. It may for a short moment, but in the long run it only creates a deeper desire and capacity for sex, which will lead to more masturbation. If you let yourself become enslaved to a sexual high, you will find that you need to go to increasingly extreme acts to maintain the same degree of excitement. There are even ungodly sex therapists who recommend masturbation as a way of increasing sexual desire, not lessening it. This creates a vicious circle, like the junkie who craves a “fix,” but is only temporarily satisfied. The more he indulges in his dependency, the more ensnared by addiction he becomes. This is the nature of all sin. That is why Jesus declared that all who sin become a slave to sin (John 8:34).

Furthermore, masturbation usually involves fantasy, visualization, and often pornography. The Bible is very clear as to what God expects of us in these areas of fantasy and lust. It teaches that we must not look lustfully at each other nor should we behave in such a manner as to entice others to lust after us.

“I made a covenant with my eyes not to look with lust upon a girl. I know full well that the Almighty God sends calamity on those who do” (Job 31:1-3, The Living Bible).

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:28).

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“What does the Bible say about masturbation?” is one of our most frequently asked questions. Many Christians have found it difficult to answer this question according to the Bible, because the Bible never mentions masturbation specifically. To understand how God feels about this subject, we must examine other verses that deal with issues such as lust, self-control and purity. Also, we must examine its fruit to see if it is from God. We have tried to address this issue by answering some of the most frequently asked questions. Our prayer is that God will use this page to bring freedom and deliverance.

“Does God care about what we do in the privacy of our bedrooms?”

$ex is God’s invention. He is the mastermind behind it-and His creation is worth far more to Him than it is to us. This beautiful expression of love was created out of His own heart, as a gift to be experienced between a husband and wife. It is only in marriage that this manifestation of intimacy can be fully enjoyed in the depth for which it was created.

“Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and the sexually immoral” (Hebrews 13:4, NIV).

“Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge” (Hebrews 13:4, KJV).

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Comfort Zones and Our Spirituality

If there is any area in our lives where comfort zones can really have a negative effect on us, it is in our spiritual lives. Here is the place where other people cannot see. Our spiritual lives do not normally affect others as much as our practical lives and our outward relationships do, or at least that is what we like to think. The truth is, our spiritual lives is what is affecting everything else. We think no one is affected by our spirituality or lack of spirituality because it is all an invisible process taking place deep inside our own souls.

Comfort zones affect our spirituality more than anything else because our spirituality is the foundation of who we are, how we deal with people, how we deal with the world, and really how we deal with ourselves.

Comfort zones can get in the way of our spirituality because deep within ourselves we have created comfy little places where we do not need to really face the facts of who we are. True spiritual practices will make you confront these places. You must confront these places and make choices about who you really want to be.

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Who Can Be Against Us?

Paul’s direct reference to Psalm 44 demonstrates that when we feel God doesn’t care and is indifferent to the plight of the faithful, we’re dead wrong. God couldn’t be more for us.

The quote is sandwiched between Paul’s stunning declaration that, “If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?” (Romans 8:31–32), and his magnificent proclamation that we are more than conquerors through him who loved us because nothing in all creation can separate us from God’s love (Romans 8:37–39).

We may live with lingering questions about our suffering. Many questions may go unanswered, particularly the haunting question of Why? We can trust that God has reasons (perhaps ten thousand reasons), although we may not see or understand many of them in this life. But the overarching reason lies in the glorious truth of Romans 8:31–39. While we may see only in part now, we can trust that all that God does is out of his incomparable and unfathomable love for us.

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Like Sheep to Be Slaughtered

In verses 17–22, the psalmist maintains that God’s actions were not because the Israelites had sinned. They had not forgotten God or worshiped idols or willfully disobeyed him, but rather were faithful and true to God’s covenant. Their hearts had not turned back, nor had their feet strayed from the path. And yet God still broke them.

Verse 22 is a final word defending their innocence and obedience: “Yet for your sake we are killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.” In other words, “We are trusting you, Lord, and we are dying for you. Rather than rescuing us, you are behind our earthly destruction.” That may be the cry of martyrs around the world today, who are proclaiming God’s love while being led to their death. And it may be the lament of faithful Christians who are struggling with terminal cancer, unending pain, and precipitous loss. Our lives are in God’s hands, and we are being crushed.

“God can never forget his people, for they are carved on the palms of his hands.”

This feels shocking. That God would willingly lead us as sheep to be slaughtered when we are faithfully serving him can make us wonder if he cares about us at all. Which makes it even more surprising that Paul would quote this verse in Romans 8:36, as an example of how we can never be separated from God’s love. The implication is that when we are at our lowest — feeling abandoned by God and growing increasingly hopeless — God is actually lavishing his love on us. He is making us more than conquerors in the place where we’ve been tasting bitter defeat and can’t sense his presence.

While we associate the times of abundance and success with God’s favor, Paul is reminding us that God’s love is as strong as ever when we are facing despair and even death. The psalmist mourned that God had rejected and crushed them, implying that God was against them, but Paul reframes that perspective for Christians, asserting that even in our darkest moments — especially in our darkest moments? — God is working for our good.

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Not by Our Own Arm

The psalm begins with praise, acknowledging God’s goodness and faithfulness to his people in days of old. In verses 1–8, the psalmist declares that their ancestors flourished and defeated their enemies not because of their skill, but because of God’s intervention. God delighted in Israel and put their enemies to shame, and his people praised his name. It was all God’s doing, as verse 3 says:

Not by their own sword did they win the land, nor did their own arm save them, but your right hand and your arm, and the light of your face, for you delighted in them.

Then the psalmist reiterates his present faithfulness to God. He doesn’t trust in his own resources, in his sword and bow, but it is only through God that they can be victorious. And they will boast in God and give thanks to him forever.

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Comfort Zones and Our Relationships

People do not usually consider their relationships an area that can be affected by comfort zones, but they most certainly can. It is important to explore how comfort zones affect our relationships, because it is in this area that comfort zones can be the most destructive.

Just with anything else in our life, we can get into a certain routine of habits that feel comfortable and safe with our relationships. The problem is that sometimes these routines, and these behaviors are not good for our relationships. In fact, these routines and behaviors could actually be damaging the relationship. Let’s look at a few examples of ways this can happen.

Habits- Take some time to consider what pushes the buttons of your loved ones. Most people do not enjoy this exercise, but it is beneficial if you want to improve relationships and get out of destructive comfort zones. Really consider what triggers most of the conflicts in any of your relationships.

Conflicts with your spouse, your children, your co-workers, your parents, your friends or whoever it may be are always the result of a trigger. Now consider if this trigger is a habit which can be traced back to you. This takes a great deal of personal honesty with yourself.

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Comfort Zones and Our Practical Life

Still considering Abraham’s story, let’s look at some of the practical ways that using comfort zones in an imbalanced way can hinder our practical life.

We see in verse 6 and 7 that God intended to expand Abraham far beyond what he was, who he was in his homeland.

6 And Abram passed through the land unto the place of Sichem, unto the plain of Moreh. And the Canaanite was then in the land. 7 And the Lord appeared unto Abram, and said, Unto thy seed will I give this land:

God intended to give to Abraham an entirely new land. It is estimated that Abraham traveled approximately 600 miles to get from Haran, his homeland, to Canaan. Abraham could not know how God was going to expand his family and his wealth. Abraham had no way of knowing that when God said He would make of him a great nation, just how huge and far reaching that would be. He could not have known that God was going to make of him 12 massive tribes of people.

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