August 12, 2025
Becky Sweat
However, good friendships don’t “just happen”—especially in our fast-paced, digitally-focused world.
If we’re going have close connections with others, we must be intentional about it.
These seven practices will help build and maintain friendships.
I have a plaque in my office which reads, “Friends are God’s way of taking care of us.” While God is our ultimate caregiver, He certainly places individuals in our lives to encourage and support us. 
I can think of many times over the years when I was tired, down or just needing some laughs, and then I’d get a call or an impromptu visit by a friend and suddenly I felt much better. I can’t imagine going through life without these special “people connections.”
This is the kind of companionship Solomon described in Ecclesiastes 4:9, 11-12. He wrote, “Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor . . . Again, if two lie down together, they will keep warm . . . Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him.”
Of course these kind of relationships don’t just happen. They have to be nurtured. Yet, in our fast-paced society, where there’s always something urgent that needs to be done or should have been done yesterday, close friendships are becoming hard to come by. Today just about everyone is overbusy, overstretched and overscheduled. Between work, classes, household chores and family commitments, we may have convinced ourselves there isn’t enough time to devote to friendships.
We might try to rely on social media to meet our need for people contact. So we’ll spend a few minutes now and then sharing posts about what’s happening in our lives or we’ll comment on what other people post. Or, perhaps we’ll send text messages to friends to say “hi” and let them know we’re thinking of them. These things can help us stay connected on some level. However, they can’t replace the interactions we might have in-person or over the phone. They’re not the way to build close connections.
Sadly, recent research has shown that many Americans can’t name even three friends with whom they can have heart-to-heart conversations with. It’s not that they don’t have people in their lives; it’s that they don’t feel deep connections with those individuals.