God created us to live within a God-fearing community, not alone. He even promises to be amongst us when “two or three are gathered in His name”. Other people are able to empathise with our pains, point out our blind spots, share God’s truths with us, and most importantly, pray with us to seek the Holy Spirit’s work in our lives.
Matthew 18:19-20 ESV Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.”
Proverbs 11:14 ESV Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety.
It is important, however, to exercise wisdom in choosing the believers or counselors we open up to. Some important qualities include:
- God first: Prays and consults God often.
- Exhibit God’s grace: Will not hold onto judgments. Focused on redemption, not condemnation or “fixing” people. Will not be controlling or manipulative.
- Fear God more than man: Willing to speak the truth in love and nudge us in our journey of healing. Will point us to God, not to themselves.
- Confidentiality: Will not gossip or slander.
- Humility: Kind, patient, respectful and gentle. Will not be easily offended. Willing to practice mutual confession.
Just as we seek these qualities in our counselors, we too must be willing to practise these same principles. Accountability and counseling with God’s people is a two-way street.
Proverbs 27:5-6 ESV Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.
Also, see Confessing to receive freedom
