My second advice for women who were unfaithful, may be hard at times but it goes along with the process of recovery from your affair.
- Be accountable of your time away from your husband. We’re not used to giving an account of where we are and what we’re doing. Or, show proof we really were where we said we were going to be. It was hard for me at first too. But then I realized- I was the one that created this mess for us– not him. So, I had to own up to the consequences if I wanted to get my marriage back and have my husband trust me again.
- I didn’t even go out shopping alone very much at that time, and when I did, I had my cell phone on and always answered when he called. Not answering his calls was also a trigger for my husband, so I was diligent with that. Just remember, this season won’t last forever. But the more consistent you are in this, the quicker he’ll heal.
- Give him all your passwords and emails. Let him have complete access to all your social media accounts, your emails and your phone.
- Understand how he feels when you’re not with him. Leaving the house will be a huge trigger for your husband and he’s going to be worried. You would be too if the roles were reversed. What helps even more is when you take a proactive approach and show him everything before he even asks. This is all very important if you want to heal your husband’s heart after your affair.
I’ll be honest, there will be times you’ll get sick of being accountable. Frustration and despair will likely come in when it seems everything you do is shrouded in a cloud of suspicion. Those were hard days for us. But the hard days became less and less, and eventually he trusted me again. It can happen for you too.