Don’t criticize a survivor of abuse for being where they were at the time, for not resisting more or screaming, for not talking about it earlier or for anything else. Anybody, anywhere, can be a victim of abuse, regardless of age, gender, looks, dress and so on. Regardless of circumstances “no” means “no,” and nobody deserves to be raped.

Myths about women “asking for it” or men being “unable to help themselves” create a burden of guilt on the survivor in the first place, and they may already feel partly responsible. Any criticism of their handling of the situation, either during the attack or afterward, simply adds to that guilt, and it is important that the blame is placed firmly where it belongs – with the person who committed the assault.

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